this is US, but the skies are blue and the grass is green

The sky is still the same color, the sun still shines here, the grass still gives the same feel when I sit on it after playing, and yet it is US. Unbelievable right. Wrong. This is still earth and US is just a part of it, I have seen water puddles after rain, yes - it also rains in US. Can u believe it garbage smells the same, alcohol has the same effect, u still fight to get on the overloaded bus to School, trying to squeeze urself between the crowds. I am wondering is this US ?

Then wats different, people smile at u and greet u in the morning, keep u warm in the chilling winters by their warmth, will hold the door for u if u r approaching it, say sorry for the slightest mistake, and always extend a helping hand. This is US.

sine curve == life

Here I am yet again trying to relate to what I just wrote a few days back, did I really write it and is it actually happening, I am not so sure today...
I was trying to grasp a laser beam in an attempt to re-discover the joys of life, friends, trust, away from my own people, basking in the illusion of all that which just revealed itself to be virtual.
When you are isolated from the sanctuary called home, how easy it is to fall prey to illusions which give u the resemblance of the same warmth, trust and security you are longing for, was I the most recent prey of this enchantment...yes I was, but slowly the true colors are reflecting back in my life, and I am opening my eyes not in dreams but reality, opening and awakening myself to what is facing me at right angles.
Probably now I understand why addicts become what they are, I understand how easy it is to become an addict and how fruitless to come out of it, but consciously I am letting myself be trapped in this addiction. I know I should not , but I want to and probably I will allow myself that luxury of falling in the trap, coz I feel its a way to vent out my bitterness. But vent it out on whom, MYSELF, to consciously go and do what is wrong is called eccentricity, but I am ready to become an eccentric and be called mad, if it gives me the privilege to not become mad at others, to not let out my bitterness at others and be my happy go lucky self with people around me, coz if I cant make my life better, atleast I can lessen their unpleasant moments.